Some people say that Denton Bible Church is too big, but the ones who say that have not discovered the “families” that make up DBC. I’m talking about ministries where you serve together, grow together, and comfort one another during tough times. One of the ministries that Steve served with before he got sick is the Sweat Team, a group of men and women dedicated to helping the poor, widows, and the sick. The Sweat Team mows yards, paints houses, does plumbing, electrical work, and carpentry such as building ramps. Steve put in ceiling fans, GFI’s, and did other electrical jobs as part of the Sweat Team. 

Right after Steve got diagnosed with mantle cell lymphoma, Wayne Carrigan, head of the Sweat Team, presented us with money that the Sweat Team had collected for us to go on vacation. We were blown away at the amount they gave us. Sadly, Steve felt he did not have the strength to go far. We used some of the money for gas to drive to Waco to meet my family for lunch. Some of the money took us out to eat, some of the money paid medical bills, and the rest we put in savings.

Since Steve and I can no longer worship with the body of Christ in the church building, God brings church to us. Our pastors, Tommy Nelson and Mike Spencer, came to visit Steve in February. We talked about the Lord, about heaven, about Steve’s illness, and then Tommy prayed with us. Their visit encouraged Steve greatly in his journey to finish well.

Steve was in the choir, and fellow choir member Bill Stewart began bringing us the CD’s of the church service and the worship music. We get our Bibles out and participate via CD in the service. Bill serves in the media ministry and puts in the announcements and prayers, so we get the entire service.

I put two folding chairs in the bedroom so people can visit with Steve there when he’s too tired to get up. Those chairs have gotten a lot of use! We have great conversations about the Lord, the Bible, and heaven when people come over, and visits often end in prayer. We experience joy, peace, love, and laughter with our brothers and sisters in Christ. This is just a foretaste of heaven when we’ll all be together worshiping the Lord with the angels.

John 17:24:  Father, I desire that they also, whom You have given Me, be with Me where I am, so that they may see My glory which You have given Me, for You loved Me before the foundation of the world. 

Just think, some day we will see Jesus’ glory and live with Him face-to-face! This high priestly prayer of Jesus in John 17 before He went to the cross gives us insight into some of the incredible things awaiting us in heaven. Imagine being surrounded by the glory and love of God. No wonder it says the following in Revelation 5:11-12:

Then I looked, and I heard the voice of many angels around the throne and the living creatures and the elders; and the number of them was myriads of myriads, and thousands of thousands, saying with a loud voice,

“Worthy is the Lamb that was slain to receive power and riches and wisdom and might and honor and glory and blessing.”

Recently Charles Stolfus and John Brown preached eloquently about heaven. It seemed like the messages were tailor-made for us. So many of our thoughts and conversations veer toward heaven because of our situation. We praise God for the sure hope of heaven!

Psalm 139:15-16 says: My frame was not hidden from You when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.  Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be.

God ordained our time on earth before we were born. Our days are in His hands. These verses comforted us as we met with the oncologist and heard that there were few options for treatment. Steve chose not to go the route of experimental treatment since it would mean two weeks in the hospital with massive chemo several different times with no guarantee of success. He has a heart problem, and the oncologist said he might not even be a candidate for massive chemo.  Steve decided no more tests, no more doctors. The oncologist gave him four to six months to live. But…all the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be. The Lord has graciously given Steve more time than the oncologist said. We are currently in the eighth month of Steve’s illness.

So many difficult milestones in February as Steve grew weaker…his last Sunday in choir, his last day on the Sweat team…our last Sunday in an entire church service.  First Thessalonians 5:18 says to give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. To quote Jerry Bridges again: “He (God) knows before He initiates or permits the adversity exactly how He will use it for our good.” Steve and I thank God constantly, not for the cancer, but for the good that He will bring about through our circumstances.

Throughout the illness, Steve has kept his sense of humor. About his weight loss he says, “That’s to make it easier on the pall bearers.” When people tell him he’s looking good his comment is, “Yeah, from the neck up.” We don’t skirt the issue of dying. We talk about heaven often. As Steve says, “It’s a win-win for Christians,” and “I get to go sing in the big choir.” Having a terminal illness causes you to focus on your eternal home, and that’s a great thing.

In the next post I want to share some of the incredible ways our church family has blessed us during these past months.

 

 

8/6/13

 

Life as we know it can change in an instant. My husband Steve and I celebrated our 33rd wedding anniversary on January 12, 2013. A week later our world turned upside down. James 4:14 says, "Yet you do not know what your life will be like tomorrow. You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away." That reality can smack you in the face when you least expect it.

 

January 19, 2013 will be forever burned into my memory. As I sat in our missions conference at Denton Bible Church, I felt a touch on my shoulder. I looked up and saw Steve beckoning me to join him in the foyer. After we sat down, he said, "The doctor just called me with the test results. The CT scan showed the lymph nodes are enlarged, and the chest X-ray showed that my lungs have shrunk. She thinks I have lymphoma. She's sending me to a surgeon for a biopsy." Stunned and shocked, I looked up and saw Mike Spencer, one of our pastors and our ABF teacher. We walked over and told him what we had just found out. He prayed with us and comforted us. We know without a doubt that God had Mike in the foyer just for us.

 

Our heavenly Father started us on this journey with love and grace, and He continues to shower us with blessings too numerous to tell. So our journey began. Walk along with me as I recount God's faithfulness and the peace and joy He's given us these past months.

 

8/12/13

 

Psalm 32:10 says, “Many are the woes of the wicked, but the Lord’s unfailing love
surrounds the one who trusts in Him.”  We focused on the Lord’s unfailing love as Steve underwent a needle biopsy on a lymph node in his neck the following week.  We knew something was wrong when the surgeon called the lab after the biopsy and asked for a rush report. She confirmed that Steve had lymphoma and immediately scheduled an outpatient procedure for another biopsy. Steve was put to sleep, and the surgeon removed a lymph node in his neck to determine what kind of lymphoma he had. We had no idea that there are 60+ kinds of lymphoma.

 

Psalm 27:14 – “Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord.” We thought we would get the results back in a few days, but we waited and waited and waited. When anxious thoughts tried to envelop us, we went to God’s Word and did what this verse said; we took courage because we had experienced God’s faithfulness over the years. Three weeks later the doctor called with the results. The reason it took so long was because Steve has a rare form of lymphoma called mantle cell. Only six percent of people in the U.S. are diagnosed with it every year. We learned that it is a very aggressive form of cancer with few symptoms which means the majority of people are diagnosed in stage four.

 

As all this was going on, I was reading Jerry Bridges’ book, Trusting God Even When Life Hurts. On page 20 Bridges quotes Romans 11:33 which says, “Oh, the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God!  How unsearchable his judgments, and his paths beyond tracing out!”  Bridges writes, “God’s plans and His ways of working out His plan are frequently beyond our ability to fathom and understand. We must learn to trust when we don’t understand.” How true that is!

 

Steve and I clung to the Lord as we saw an oncologist. Steve underwent a bone marrow biopsy, a PET scan, and more blood work. More waiting…and then we found out that Steve had stage four mantle cell lymphoma that is in all his lymph nodes, his bones, and most of his major organs. He had already begun to lose weight, and over a three month period would lose 30 pounds.

 

What do you do when you get news like this? You pray, you cry, then you live one day at a time trusting God. Psalm 50:15 says, “And call upon Me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you will honor Me.”

 

The bottom line amounts to this - Steve’s cancer is not about us at all. It’s about bringing glory to God and about His fulfilling His purposes through our circumstances. God continues to shower us with blessings too numerous to tell as we walk this journey. Our persistent prayer is that people would praise God for His abundant care of us and realize what a loving, compassionate God we serve. In future posts I’ll write about some of the many ways we’ve experienced His love, faithfulness, joy, peace, and compassionate care. Praise His holy Name!